The Prophet and Women – 2

the prophet pbuh encouraged husbands to spend on their wives. he said,

"you will not spend any expenditure seeking the approval of allah but that you will be rewarded for it – even the bite of food you put into the mouth of your wife."(al-bukhari and muslim)

and he pointed out that what is spent on the family is the best expenditure, saying,

 "the best dinar is the one a man spends on his dependants."(muslim)

he also said,

"when a man gives his wife a drink of water he is rewarded."(ahmad – graded by al-albani as hasan) when `irbaadh ibn sariah heard this hadith he hastened to bring some water to his wife to drink, telling her what he had heard from the messenger of allah pbuh.

this is how the prophet pbuh taught his companions good treatment of women, affection and sympathy towards them, providing them with all kinds of benefit and spending on them appropriately.

the prophet pbuh made clear that good treatment of women is a sign of the nobility of a man's soul and generosity of his nature. he stated,

"the best of you is the best of you to your wives."(ahmad and at-tirmidhi) 

and he pbuh forbade hatred of one's wife, saying,

 "let not a male believer hate a female believer; if he dislikes one trait of hers he will be pleased with another one."(muslim)

thus, the prophet ordered men to look for the positive aspects and praiseworthy actions in women and overlook the errors and negative aspects, because looking for bad behaviour and dwelling upon it leads to aversion and dislike between the spouses.

he prohibited beating women, saying, "do not strike the female servants of allah." (abu dawud) and he rthreatened those who harm them with the words:

"o allah, indeed, i make binding the right of the two vulnerable ones: the orphan and the woman."(ahmad and ibn majah)

it meant that he would not make lawful the harming of either of them, and whoever does so has exposed himself to difficulty and punishment in this world and the next.

he pbuh also prohibited husbands from exposing the secrets (private aspects) of their wives, as he prohibited wives from exposing the secrets of their husbands. he said, "the worst of people in position before allah on the day of resurrection will be a man who has intercourse with his wife and then spreads her secret."[1](muslim)

the prophet also honoured women by prohibiting husbands from assuming evil about their wives or suspicion of them. jabir –may allah be pleased with him reported:

"the messenger of allah pbuh prohibited men from surprising their wives by night, suspecting betrayal or seeking to catch their faults." (al-bukhari and muslim)

as for the conduct of allah's messenger with his own wives, it was of the utmost sensitivity and kindness. al-aswad reported: "i asked `a'ishah how the prophet was with his wives. she said, 'he pbuh was in the occupation of his wife,' meaning that he rassisted her in her work. 'but when it was time for the prayer he would get up for prayer. (al-bukhari)

he pbuh would try to please his wives and amuse them with pleasant conversation and sweet words. an example is when he pbuh said to `a'ishah, "i know your anger and your contentment."

she said, "how do you know that, o messenger of allah?" he said,

"when you are content you say, 'yes, by the lord of muhammad.' but when you are angry you say, 'no, by the lord of abraham.'"

she said, "yes, by allah, o messenger of allah; i do not abandon except your name." (al-bukhari and muslim) she meant that her love of him was firm in her heart and did not change.

the prophet pbuh never forgot his wife, khadijah after her death. anas -may allah be pleased with him-reported: "when the prophet pbuh got a gift he  would say, 'take it to so-and-so, for she was a friend of khadijah. (at-tabarani)

this is how our prophet honoured women, so how do those who call for the "liberation of women" compare to it? 

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[1]i.e., describes it to others.