Approach your tilth when or how you will
Bahz ibn Hakim reported on the authority of his father from his grandfather (Mu'awiyah ibn Haydah) , may Allah be pleased with him, as saying:
I said: O Messenger of Allah, how should we approach our wives and how should we leave them? He replied: Approach your tilth when or how you will, give her (your wife) food when you take food, clothe when you clothe yourself, do not revile her face, and do not beat her.
Abu Dawud said: The version of Shu'bah has: That you give her food when you have food yourself, and that you clothe her when you clothe yourself.
The Prophet ( may the peace and blessings of Allah be upon him ) likened the wife to the tilth as she is like the land ready for cultivation when her husband puts the seeds in her.
Likening the wife to the tilth gives an impression that her husband can have sex with her any time and by any way as long as the intercourse is in the normal place; this is by sowing the seeds ( the vagina ) as well the intercourse must not be in the anal because it is not a place to sow the seeds.
The Prophet ( may the peace and blessings of Allah be upon him ) said in this commandment: " give her (your wife) food when you have food, clothe when you clothe yourself." Indicates that the husband is obliged to spend on his wife in return for having sex with her, as well as for serving him. Moreover, she is the mother of his children and the housewife entitled to have maintenance.
This maintenance shall be from the same kind of what he spends on himself. For instance, if he eats food she shall share it with him, it is not permissible for him to distinguish himself with anything worthy of mentioning except with her consent.
This is the justice required by the marriage that is based on affection and mercy.
The balance of justice in Islam is to receive the due rights as well as to fulfill the duties. .
The Prophet ( may the peace and blessings of Allah be upon him ) said: " do not revile her face, and do not beat her.
" ie, do not abuse her, do not look at her face scornfully.
Please note dear Muslim that the marital life is based on ten principles: justice, generosity, pardon, knowledge, piety, cooperation, honesty, trusting each other, sincerity and understanding.